Raes of Light | Charlotte Bield

At the end of the day love wins and family is the prize.

You’ve just launched a very personal, soulful project, Rae & Reign, please share it with us.

I created the Rae & Reign platform as a way to connect with other mamas who have already adopted, want to adopt or have a heart for adoption, by creating beautiful products that simplify, celebrate and commemorate every part of their adoption and unique family journey.

When I became a mama through the wonderful process of adoption – twice, I was frustrated by the lack of representation and celebration my journey to motherhood had in the mama-to-be space.

Through Rae & Reign I now get to create beautiful, thoughtful and useful products, which I wish I had access to! This isn’t just a commercial venture; this is literally my life, my heart, soul and my lived experience that I want to use to serve the pioneering, brave new mamas out there.

I’m all about using my experience, skill and passion to make the adoption process (and the wonderfully unique family life thereafter) just a little bit easier, fun and special.

Earlier this month I launched with my first two digital products, a frequently asked adoption question and answer social media pack and a DYI adoption profile template. But I am working on some very exciting products like exclusive mama and me headbands/wraps, adoption process milestone cards, a kindergarten and primary school “pack” for teachers and parents of classmates and even a podcast launching soon!

What books are on your bedside table?

I’m obsessed with books. Right now I’m reading Shama, a Daily Walk of Listening and Obeying, Growing kids with character 2.0., The Alter Ego Effect and Thou Shalt Prosper.

What comforts you when you feel low?

Praying, getting into the word of God and listing to and singing along to my favourtite songs. Couple this with some good old fashioned comfort food and my bed, and I don’t feel down for too long!

What have you learned the hard way in life?

NEVER leave the keys to your automatic car in the ignition when you haven’t put the car in park. It will roll backwards! Also, I cannot take ownership of, or carry other people’s emotions.

What dreams do you have for your daughters?

This question makes me smile because I have actually been very intentional about not dreaming any dreams for my girls. I never want to get so caught up in my ideals or ideas for their lives that I miss the unique and divine gifts that have been deposited in their spirits.

I always want to stay open to what they perceive and want to pursue as their best lives. Instead of measuring them against the yardstick of my dreams (which may or may not be in line with their best life.)

I look for what they are great at and ask myself how can I develop or encourage the light they already have so that they will be confident and comfortable to set their world on fire when they are ready. I do however teach them to love Jesus, themselves and other people unapologetically and to love and live with open hearts and open hands.

What lessons have your daughters taught you?

To not sweat the small stuff and to stop trying to control the big stuff, this is an exercise in futility and frustration!

What piece of advice would you give your 21-year-old self?

First of all, I’d tell myself that I am NOT FAT, and to stop spending so much money on freaking beauty treatments! Also, I’d remind myself that, “right now, at 21, you have no idea of the joy and blessing that is waiting for you in the future, so don’t sweat the small stuff and let go of those unhealthy relationships and toxic people. All the love, power and “balls” you need will arrive just on time and not a minute before or a second too late.

What would you tell your future self if you wrote a letter to her now?

Truth will remain true no matter how much time passes or how many mysteries we endure. Keep holding fast to what you KNOW deep in your soul to be true. Don’t waste one more sent on beauty products or anti-aging-anything. Rather take that money and go see a country you haven’t seen yet, buy the fancy ice-cream and dress however the hell you want! Just be. Be happy. Be kind. Love on your people and drink more water than you drink coffee.

What is your idea of happiness?

For me happiness it the pursuit of habitually living from that place inside of you that is immovable and unchanged by whatever is happening around you.

It is the wisdom to be able to discern what is permanent and what is fleeting in life, as well as in your emotions and your relationships. It is the wisdom and strength to choose to not waste energy on the momentary but invest in the eternal.

What scent is most evocative for you?

Citrus.

It’s cold and rainy and you’re home alone – how do you spend your day?

On my bed surrounded my books, notebooks and highlighters. Sipping hot cocoa while taking turns reading, listening to music, watching Netflix and napping.

Who would you most like to receive a postcard from?

Michelle Obama.

Who would you love to have tea with and why?

Nelson Mandela (if he was still alive) and Sarah Jubilee, she is an amazing author with an incredible insight into spiritual things that I am striving to figure out.

What’s the best piece of advice you ever got?

When I was a teenager I distinctly remember coming home in tears one day, incredibly upset that I didn’t have blonde hair and blue eyes like the most popular girl in school. My dad gave me the best advice when I asked through my tears why I can’t be as beautiful as her. He calmly told me that one of my classmates was probably at home crying to her dad too, lamenting the fact that she didn’t look like me.

He told me that there will always be someone better looking, better qualified, and better off than me. “But”, he said, “there will also always be someone worse off than you.” He thought me not to live in the extreme space but rather keep a balanced view of life and the people in it.

Right now, I’m loving…. Bleach blonde hair and sweet milk cheese.

Share a quote and why it inspires you

I’ve recently discovered the St Francis prayer and I love it as a kind of a how-to piece for hard moments. I.e. what to do in the moments you feel doubt, remember to have faith etc.

“Lord make me an instrument of your peace
Where there is hatred let me sow love
Where there is injury, pardon
Where there is doubt, faith
Where there is despair, hope
Where there is darkness, light
And where there is sadness, joy”

What does self-care look like in your life now?

Checking in with myself regularly and making sure that I leave white space to get what I need, whether that is taking a long bath, getting some exercise or going to see a movie.

One thing I care less about as I grow older is… waxing. I mean, seriously, we all have hair, and if you don’t like it, don’t look.

One thing I care more about as I grow older is… where I invest my time and energy.

At the end of the day… love wins and family is the prize.

 To follow Charlotte’s beautiful journey, please join her on social media as @charlottebield

Website www.raeandreign.co.za